darkbookworm13: dios-404: prokopetz: Why do …

darkbookworm13:

dios-404:

prokopetz:

Why do the movies never show us this Spider-Man?

Fun fact Spider-man once beat the Hulk by telling him a joke that was so funny he turned back into Bruce Banner to laugh

I think we can all identify with this version of Spiderman

peashooter85: libertarian-lady: I can’t beli…

peashooter85:

libertarian-lady:

I can’t believe what I just watched. I truly never thought I would see this day. The South and North Korean presidents meeting at the DMZ, crossing each other’s borders, and walking together to the south for a summit.

I have so much hope for what this could mean for the people suffering in the North.

If I got the opportunity to shake Kim Jong Un’s hand at the DMZ I would be so tempted to put him in a headlock and give him a noogie.

Photo

Photo

gayred5: gracetowns: romeo and juliet (1.4) – …

gayred5:

gracetowns:

romeo and juliet (1.4) – william shakespeare

romeo: i had this intense af dream last night bro
mercutio: oh so did i
romeo: what did u dream dude
mercutio: that ur full of shit

Regular

the-last-hair-bender:

ilarual:

jaclcfrost:

char-ientism:

jaclcfrost:

jaclcfrost:

phrases like “i’ll be the distraction you go on ahead without me” generally do not have a tendency to end well

“i’ll catch up with you” no. no you probably won’t

“we’ll talk about this later” there is no later

“it’ll be alright” not for you since you just said that and doomed yourself

“Well whatever it was it’s gone now” YOU JUST SEALED YOUR FATE FRIEND.

autumnlaw28: me as a parent

autumnlaw28:

me as a parent

Photo

Photo

nshait: threefreeze: shakespeare was ahead of …

nshait:

threefreeze:

shakespeare was ahead of his time

reblog if baby don’t hurt me just played in your head in perfect tonality

Space Australian Medicine

nodaudaboutitt:

jumpingjacktrash:

saffronheliotrope:

jumpingjacktrash:

mx-delta-juliette:

Despite the best efforts of everyone involved, something truly nasty escaped Earth. They call it giardia, a microscopic organism that their Planetary Protection Officer called “pretty dumb” and “not too bad, really, a week of digestive upset and then it’s over.”

Yes, Earth has a Planetary Protection Officer. They have a Planetary Protection Office, and have had one since they were sending probes around their own solar system. Doctor Ma-et had found it a bit silly, like a child concerned about the cleanliness of their toys, until she learned that the job of the Planetary Protection Office had always been protecting other worlds from Earth.

Keep reading

i love this so much.

i love this individual piece of writing, and i also love the narrative tumblr has been developing around Crazy Primates From The Death Planet Just Want To Love You. it feels so real and so US. it feels like maybe if genuine contact happens, this is how it’ll go down.

we’re too young, as a species, to do any galactic business of our own. we’re barbaric and awkward, still fighting amongst ourselves for resources. we’d probably make the galactic powers very nervous. but the thing is, there is nothing more dangerous to a human than another human, and hasn’t been for centuries, and this is on a world where half the ‘habitable’ environments regularly kill people and the rest only kill people on occasion with floods and stuff. we make buddies with our predators, we make our diseases brew us chemicals and fuel. we turn everything to our own use, and would bloom through the universe like a horrible all-consuming plague – except that we already sorta did that a little bit on our own planet, we were THAT powerful, and we learned not to.

we are the infant titans who, having seen our siblings eaten, swore to protect instead of consume. we police each other – and ourselves – at the deepest levels, down to the bones of our spirituality. even the most vicious warmonger knows, KNOWS, in their heart of hearts, that what they do is not right, and will not be allowed to go on.

more advanced species didn’t have to learn this lesson, because they weren’t violent to begin with, or learned it a long slow way under the tutelage of older powers. and here we are already, these holy fools, who hold death itself in our hands, and have the hunger for infinity in our eyes, and they ask us what we plan to do with this power, and we say: “where can we help?”

“and also, can we pet your dog?”

I love this so very much, both the fic and the commentary. As much as I love Star Trek and always will, its utopian vision of humanity as a distinguished part of the galactic UN, everybody-just-learning-to-get-along seems a little impossible at times like these. This picture of reckless, a little bumbling, ultimately good-hearted and good-doing humanity seems somehow more plausible, and gives me some real flickers of long-term hope.

a further thought on my previous thought:

if humans are the one species so toxic we learned by experience not to be a hegemonizing swarm before we developed time travel, and survived it… that means anyone who starts trying evil empire shenanigans now is NEW AT IT.

imagine a relatively little-known species suddenly gets to acting real hincty, breaking treaties and taking stuff and breaking stuff. the galactic council is horrified. the humans are like “oh they’re just being little shits, smack ‘em on the snoot.” the galactic council respectfully suggests the humans volunteer to be the ones doing the smacking. the humans point out that yeah, that is what they were doing.

the first ones to show up are, as always, the helpers. maybe this change in behavior is due to some disease or disaster. but nope, it turns out to be a nasty ideological vector, and the humans know from long experience that this one does not go away on its own, but fighting it from the outside makes it last so much longer.

so the next ones to show up are a different kind of helper: military advisors.

galactics: what are you doing??? you’re making it worse!

humans: worse? or BETTER???

under clearly delined circumstances and non-allegiances, so as not to break any interplanetary laws on behalf of humanity, these vicious masters of war teach the upstarts how it’s done. from the warp-tech version of village-burnings to mutually assured destruction, with defcon settings and terror alerts in all the spaceports, in under a generation. the upstarts have gotten much better at war, but only in their own space, and they are learning how it is that a whole species can be tired.

galactics: ok, we think we kinda see what you’re up to, but it’s awful and we wish you would’ve just made them stop fighting.

humans: you can only do that to forces that understand they’re in trouble. when we first got there, they were still having fun.

galactics: we don’t understand.

humans: right. the sick thing is, war is fun. that’s the disease. you can’t fight fun with bigger, better fun. you have to run ‘em around their own back yard until they work off the rush. only then can they look at their own mess and wonder what cleanup’s gonna be like.

galactics: it makes a weird kind of sense. so is that it, now? are they done? are they… cured?

humans: hahahahahahaha no. they’re just finally starting their treatment. now we send in the economists.

@echey

nerdsandgamersftw: Halo Minimalist Art By Jake…

nerdsandgamersftw:

Halo Minimalist Art

By Jake Robinson